Joy and Raven

joy and raven ₁
may come over tonight ₂
so i may be dead by morning ₃
but for now i’m alright ₄

i wanted to tell you a story ₅
of a girl whose eyes broke for me and ₆
she cried herself a sea ₇
but i know ₈
it would be ₉
i know ₁₀
it would be wrong ₁₁

darkness and sorrow ₁₂
may on the sill alight ₁₃
so my eyes may drown or burn down ₁₄
but i’ll enjoy the sight ₁₅

i wanted to let you in ₁₆
on what is concealed behind my grin ₁₇
but i guess ₁₈
you’d misunderstand ₁₉
i guess you'd call it sin ₂₀

cassidy and jasper ₂₁
may be wed tonight ₂₂
and of all vows theirs shall never ₂₃
ever be held slight ₂₄

to say to you ₂₅
what i felt i needed to ₂₆
would be to spill a whole fuck of blue ₂₇
and then who ₂₈
and then ₂₉
who would you do? ₃₀

joyless raven ₃₁
spins to the ground tonight ₃₂
no happily living for good this time ₃₃
but you know she'll be alright ₃₄
1992

Repentance

the resemblance was amazing ₁
she had nails in her hands ₂
an angel with an arrow stabbed her heart out ₃
i wanted to cry so i laughed out loud ₄
and packed my eyes full of sand ₅
full of sand, filled with sand... ₆

and she no longer believes in god ₇

she was drowning in a cornfield ₈
mother mary just would not set her free ₉
when father oak was burned in his sleep ₁₀
she couldn’t follow me ₁₁
but no chains made could this slave baby keep ₁₂
baby keep ₁₃

and she no longer believes in god ₁₄

marry magdelaine ₁₅
pulled a new york subway train ₁₆
but god doesn’t mind, she's catholic ₁₇

sally jesus jane ₁₈
hit her little boy again ₁₉
but she’s repentant this time ₂₀

in a used toyota she made her way southwest ₂₁
landing on the table of bread and love ₂₂
one more try the eucharist at lips ₂₃
she eats the child’s flesh ₂₄
and she swallows his blood ₂₅
drinks the blood ₂₆
and when it’s still blood ₂₇
drink the blood ₂₈
1992

Related image for those who don’t know their art history or Catholic symbolism–

IN MY SHADOW

HONOR—LIES MURDERED ₁
AND IT SEEMS HER BLOOD ₂
IS STILL UNDER MY NAILS ₃

JUSTICE—A QUIET HISS ₄
AS THE WIND GOES OUT OF ₅
MY SAILS AGAIN ₆

* THE WORLD IS DARK, SAFE, AND SURE ₇
AND IT'S JUST ME HERE IN MY SHADOW ₈
THE WORLD IS DARK, SAFE, AND SURE ₉
AND IT'S JUST ME ₁₀

SLEEPING—WHILE YOU WISH ME ₁₁
AWAKE TO PROMISE YOU NEVER TO DIE ₁₂

REACHING—FOR EACH THING ₁₃
THAT TRIES TO DROWN ME ₁₄
IN MY BLOOD WITH A CUP OF LYE ₁₅

* (chorus) ₁₆

† (screams on high unisons) ₁₇

†† (guitars trade on off beats) ₁₈

BREAKDOWN—FALL DOWN ₁₉
TEAR MY VEINS OUT ₂₀
TO YOUR BROKEN RHYTHM ₂₁

LIARS—IN DENIALS ₂₂
I HATE YOUR FRIENDS ₂₃
AND I'M STARTING TO HATE YOU WITH THEM ₂₄

* (chorus) ₂₅

HONOR—LIES MURDERED ₂₆
AND IT SEEMS TO BE ₂₇
THE SAME OLD FRAME UP AGAIN ₂₈

JUSTICE—A QUIET HISS ₂₉
AS SHE REFUSES ₃₀
TO ENROLL MY NAME AGAIN ₃₁

* (chorus) ₃₂

(bass guitar plays it out—siren in distance) ₃₃

(long pause, new track) ₃₄

(drums in, all accoustic, slight return) ₃₅

I WAS—SO IN LOVE ₃₆
WITH AN IDEA ₃₇
THAT'S BEEN SO HARD TO FIND ₃₈

SHE WAS—SO IN LOVE ₃₉
WITH A SACRIFICE ₄₀
THAT I COULD NOT PROVIDE ₄₁

SCRATCHING THE SCABS AND THINKING OF YOU ₄₂
1992

A quick note: it was written a couple of years before Jane’s Addiction released their second studio LP.

confusion infusion

after her symbolic suicide ₁
everyone heard she died ₂
the phone rang so much more ₃
than it ever did before ₄

so this is the (and when you find) ₅
* Confusion Infusion ₆
bop ₇

† if you want to know what she thinks ₈
be sure she's not your personal jinx ₉
put it all down with pen and ink ₁₀
and find out what she likes to drink ₁₁
if you get by the distractions ₁₂
find the path to her satisfaction ₁₃
help her get away with the infractions ₁₄
you can have her action ₁₅

every night on with the ritual ₁₆
but when it became, it became habitual ₁₇
everyone who read the note ₁₈
no one expected what she wrote ₁₉

† when nothing you do can affect the illusion ₂₀
she doesn't want to have the intrusion ₂₁
and it's all driving for the same conclusion ₂₂
think quick or take the contusion ₂₃
colorless eyes like one way mirrors ₂₄
something's wrong, take her to the doctor ₂₅
she's in control and she's used to more ₂₆
now you can pick your door ₂₇

is she is, is she not ₂₈
prices paid, collections sought ₂₉
still enthused for what you got ₃₀
is you are, is you not ₃₁

I wrote a couple of really nice little songs after I’d moved to Seattle and found employment. I was writing a lot of prose and such before I found a job. Once I did, music was all that would come. One, called 4 a.m., I’ve almost entirely lost and it’s a bloody shame b/c it was quite nice musically. More melodic than normal. It was sort of calling out Alanis on her loss of anger and righteousness. This is the other which marked a pretty wide departure musically… well, anyway, you can’t hear it yet so just have the lyrics.

Bingo

she has a new name now ₁
but you knew her as a friend's ₂
little sister ₃
one time at recess ₄
I recall ₅
you tried to kiss her ₆

in the shark school we played in ₇
she learned to discount sin ₈

it was a good lesson ₉
for her ₁₀
it was a good lesson for all concerned ₁₁
it was a good lesson that we all learned ₁₂

and she ₁₃
makes ₁₄
an adorable ₁₅
whore ₁₆

and bingo ₁₇
is her name now ₁₈
oh! ₁₉

we recognized each other ₂₀
out in front of ₂₁
the showbox ₂₂
she said i looked good ₂₃
i said she was still a fox ₂₄

we got to talking ₂₅
about whom who's been fucking ₂₆

she made me an offer ₂₇
said how good it would be ₂₈
she made me an offer ₂₉
and i had forty bucks on me ₃₀

and she ₃₁
makes ₃₂
an adorable ₃₃
whore ₃₄

and bingo ₃₅
is her name now ₃₆
oh! ₃₇
1998

The Jester

Trust in Me

trust in me ₁
believe in me ₂
feed me ₃
on your soul ₄
by your veins ₅
with your seed ₆
conceive by me ₇
conquer me ₈
and you can drink my sea ₉
trust in me ₁₀
believe in me ₁₁
put your faith in me ₁₂

the jester of the pharaoh made a three part gift ₁₃
to the autumn one of march and her bloody lips ₁₄
part one was only words, part two was only life ₁₅
part three is still unlisted as wedding gift for the wife ₁₆

a rose is synesthesia, is a tiger purring trite ₁₇
thirteen raven pie today, einstein brain soup tonight ₁₈
because the simple unwinds where histone proteins intertwine ₁₉
your paper eyes are empty and i don't like where you've kept me ₂₀

set say here there now there ₂₁
sure! life is fine and fair ₂₂
i done did going was am gone ₂₃
tonight you'll get your reason for going on ₂₄

trust in me ₂₅
believe in me ₂₆
feed me ₂₇
on your soul ₂₈
by your veins ₂₉
with your seed ₃₀
conceive by me ₃₁
conquer me ₃₂
and you can drink my sea ₃₃
trust in me ₃₄
believe in me ₃₅
put your faith in me ₃₆
c1992

The fate of man

she said ₁
life is an evil thing ₂
entirely composed of pain ₃
rats live—on no—evil star ₄

don't you think it's time you learned to think ₅

so i told her ₆
do you possibly suppose ₇
there is no god in human clothes ₈
and salvation's not to be the fate ₉
while we trip toward the one blind date ₁₀
let's weigh the possibility ₁₁
we're alone and eyes do see ₁₂
and all accounts are settled here ₁₃
and fair is fair is fair is clear ₁₄

don't you think it's time you learned to think—rats live... ₁₅
it's nothing personal but ₁₆
it's just a question ₁₇

i have no more drama for you ₁₈
you took it all ₁₉
i have no more karma with you ₂₀
you used it all ₂₁
i have no more feeling for you ₂₂
it's all spent ₂₃
i have no more brotherhood with you ₂₄
you're all bent ₂₅

† so now i'm saying... the fate of man is man ₂₆
and now i'm crying... the fate of man is man ₂₇
now i rejoice... the fate of man is man ₂₈
why must you become what i hate? ₂₉

don't you think it's time you learned to think—rats live... ₃₀

you said, ₃₁
life was an evil thing ₃₂
entirely encompassing pain ₃₃
how dare you be surprised? ₃₄

† so now i'm saying... the fate of man is man ₃₅
and now i'm crying... the fate of man is man ₃₆
now i rejoice... the fate of man is man ₃₇

you finally put me on the shelf ₃₈
congratulations are in order ₃₉
i have no more nothing for myself ₄₀
you should have been more careful ₄₁
just what you wished for ₄₂
because what you'll be left with is yourself, nothing more ₄₃

so now i'm saying... the fate of man is man ₄₄
and now i'm crying... the fate of man is man ₄₅
now i'm going... the fate of man is man ₄₆
“your indiscretion bores me” ₄₇
is man ₄₈
13.05.94

Gran Briggitte

Goodbye at the river ₁
Goodbye to the giver ₂
Goodbye damp shiver ₃
Goodbye at the river ₄

Ayn told me it was wrong ₅
Said it won’t hurt long ₆
She was right ₇
She was right ₈

We danced at the funeral ₉
We were quiet at the funeral ₁₀
We talked of the funeral ₁₁
We danced at the funeral ₁₂

We rode the seesaw at the cemetery gates ₁₃
Drifted pink kisses to the seeds of fate ₁₄
But it was too late ₁₅
It was too late ₁₆

You don’t care for your evil ₁₇
You don’t stare at evil ₁₈
You don’t wear evil ₁₉
You don’t care for your evil ₂₀

Well sure it was me ₂₁
But I can explain over tea ₂₂
I am me ₂₃
I am me ₂₄
I am me ₂₅
I am me ₂₆
1994

daughter of crazy horse

she gave me breathing lessons ₁
she laid me on my back ₂
she brought me dead birds in bed ₃
and i don't think i can ever go back ₄

she put up quite a struggle ₅
knocked the u.s. calvary on its ass ₆
she punctured custer's eardrums ₇
and i don't think i can ever go back ₈

she gave me drowning lessons ₉
she came and scratched my back ₁₀
she taught me pain is beautiful ₁₁
and i don't think i can ever go back ₁₂

she died inside your prisons ₁₃
came for the ghost dance then went back ₁₄
she led me to the black hills ₁₅
and i don't think i can ever go back ₁₆
May 1995

And then there were none

at first there was one ₁
just in your mind ₂
a single perfection ₃
you believed you would find ₄

* throw away the rinds ₅
in the webs of your mind ₆
you destroyed quite a few ₇
if you say so i did too ₈
it's the only way ₉
committed to the day ₁₀
when you can say… ₁₁

and then there were some ₁₂
but it wasn't the same ₁₃
before each had gone ₁₄
better ones came ₁₅

when it was then ₁₆
you taught yourself more ₁₇
about starting again ₁₈
about your sweet lord ₁₉

* ₂₀

† gotta clear my head ₂₁
stop playing dead ₂₂
get some sun ₂₃
maybe buy a gun ₂₄
for our anniversary ₂₅
i am sure ₂₆
i am fucking sure ₂₇

and then there were none ₂₈
to visit your grave ₂₉
now that it's done ₃₀
i can be safe ₃₁

the last of the last ₃₂
the ex- turned to un- ₃₃
the die was cast ₃₄
and then there were none ₃₅
June/September 1989